On "My Son/Daughter Is An Honor Student/Achiever/Good Citizen/Productive Member Of Society/Blah Blah Blah Student At Loser Jr/Sr High" Bumper Stickers

You know, when you really get down to it, nobody really cares at all that you even managed to successfully procreate, let alone how that particular offspring is doing scholastically.
So please, if you're going to live vicariously through your children, at least spice it up and choose your teenage stoner metal head child (My child can clear a six-foot bong at Hooterville High).