On The Internet

You've just got to love the masturbation superhighway. This is truly further proof of the indomitable nature of the human spirit. This fantastic technology gives us the potential to put the world's knowledge a few keystrokes away. However it's filled with mostly porn. Why is it that I can do a search for "Leopold and Loeb" (look it up) and come up with 83,700 potentially useful sights, but if I do a search for "buttplug" I get 6,770,000 hits? No, those aren't exaggerations; I just Googled each of those search terms. Just try typing random web addresses sometime and see what you get. Did you know that www.midgets.com is a porn site? The last I checked www.mustard.com and www.meat.com were as porn sites as well. It frightens me to think that at any given moment in time, there must be millions of lonely people desperately beating off at the keyboard. And because of all these people masturbating themselves stupid, I can't do a simple search for anything without ending up with 1,500 extraneous porn sites that for some reason fell under my search heading. At least these people are off the street.